Bingo in Smoking

Dear American Airlines,

As a seasoned air traveler, it has become my understanding that economy class is not comfortable for anyone. Therefore, passengers have two choices. They can do what they must to make themselves comfortable, or they can each do their part to ensure that everyone has as pleasant a journey as possible. Common sense would suggest that a flight attendant’s code would be more aligned with the latter philosophy.

During a recent 7+ hour, sold-out flight from Chicago to London, I was seated behind a passenger who was roughly the size of a CPR dummy that was used in my 5th grade gym class. The ample space given for such a small person, however, was not enough, as she found it necessary to recline (read: slam) her seat into my legs. As my legs were deeply nestled (read: crushed) into the back of her seat in the first place, this was not an ideal situation. I leaned forward and explained to her that I had very little leg room and if she wouldn’t mind sacrificing a tiny bit of reclining space so that I could be comfortable, I would really appreciate it. She said okay.

A few minutes later, she did it again. Again, I asked her to please stop. She said okay.

Shortly after, a flight attendant (whom we will call Pamela because her crew identification tag was conveniently flipped over and because she had blond hair and her blouse was buttoned inappropriately) passed and the passenger reported a problem with her seat. It couldn’t recline all the way! Why not?

Pamela pressed the button on the passenger’s seat and the seat reclined into my legs. She then identified the problem. My legs were in the way! She then asked me if I could move my legs. “Where? Into the aisle?” I asked. I then explained the situation and that I had asked the passenger twice if it would be all right if I could have a bit extra leg room to avoid a permanent tray imprint in my knees and that she had agreed. As if to prove a point, she asked my husband (5′2″) if the seat in front of HIM was digging into HIS legs. “No,” he replied, “but she is eight inches taller than me.”

Then Pamela looked at me as if I had just asked her for a complimentary filet mignon and said, “Well, she has a right to recline. She paid for the seat.”

And I don’t have the right to a comfortable flight? Pardon me, but WTF?

Allow me to present a similar scenario: You go to the movies where there is assigned seating. Despite being one of the first people to arrive at the theater, you are placed in the very back row. The show is sold out, so there is nowhere for you to move after the film starts.

The previews finish and the person in front of you stands up. This is not because of medical necessity or because he can’t see the screen already; this is simply because he can and it is his right to do so. You ask the guy if he wouldn’t mind standing more to one side or the other so that you can lean the opposite way and see the screen. He agrees, but then stays exactly where he is. An usher approaches and he complains that you asked him to move over. You explain that it is because you can’t see the screen. Then the usher says, “Well, he has the right. He bought a ticket.”

The Customer Service Plan on the American Airlines Web site reads: “We are dedicated to making every flight you take with us something special. Your safety, comfort and convenience are our most important concerns.”

Well, obviously. Thank you, Pam and crew, for making my flight extra safe, comfortable and convenient and especially for giving others license to be rude.

Regrettably yours,

Crushed in Cabin